Who is more important : Parents Or Spouse? Or Both?
I am very disappointing to see one parent’s grief on their daughter’s love affair.
I heard that everything is right in Love and War.
Today, I saw this. Why am I writing this on this topic? I wanted to help people on finding answer on such situation. I am sharing my experience here on this topic. I have seen many such cases around my society. I just share my experience on the same. You must find the right path which you can do.
There are many such cases, I have seen. But I want to share the current case. There is a girl who was studying on graduation 2nd year. She was living with her parents very happily.
She was having love affair too but no body know in her home. One day suddenly, she went to class and did not return home. She calls to her father from the local police station and tells over phone that I am officially married now. Her father shocked completely and started crying. This is the case.
Now I am telling you, there is a big question that why teenagers in this age groups are taking such actions like Surgical Strike suddenly. Weather boys and girls who used to take care of their parents so well, suddenly they hurt their parents.
Time has come to discuss such points. Both parents and children have to think about it. If you take any decisions on anger or on hurry, it is more chances that your decisions may wrong.
Here are some questions on which we can discuss:
1. Why Boys or Girls are taking such actions?
2. Why parents are not aware about their children’s issues?
3. Why children are not sharing their issues with parents?
4. What is the law on the same in the country?
5. Why boys or girls are taking decisions alone?
6. Why boys or girls are hiding such things from their parents?
Parents create Sanskara of their Children
Suppose, I am a son and fear from the father due to his anger. I always fear from him and do not talk. I also fear from my mom that she always tells my activity to my father. It is the Sanskara which we create from the childhood.
Now I am in young age and have relationship with one girl.
As per Sanskara, he never tells this thing to his parents and hide the matter. Now we should think that in this situation, Whose fault is this? No body is faulty. We as a parent, should create a good Sanskara from the childhood.
One more example, we always give mobile phones to our children when we are busy in other work. We think, kids will operate smartphones and will not disturb us. And this is becoming a Sanskara of your children. Now, children has grownup and have been playing video games all day long, we frustrate and ask our children to stop this and go to study. Who is responsible for this Sanskara?
I just want to give example to understand the logic of this Sanskara. So, Children are not wrong. They are innocent. What are we doing?
Many more questions arise. Girl is not going to tell anything to her parents, she fears of rejections or anything else. What should be the correct things? Girl should tell everything to her parents about her love like a good friend. Now parents should see the situations well and handle this.
If we talk about the law of this country, the situation will be in favor of boy and girl. If they are 18+ of age, they can take decision of themselves. We are not talking about here about legal issues but emotional relationship issues. The question is that why boys and girls are taking such steps against their parents.
Fear of Rejections
Why we have fear of rejection. I was listening to BK Shivani, Sister at Brahmakumaris. She said it is a wrong perception which we created earlier according to their impression. There is a situation:
Suppose we have made a mistake and our parents starting scolded me a lot without seeing any reason. On that time, what did we think? We made a perception about it and started hiding everything to our parents due to fear of rejection. This is the main reason.
So what should we do, we have to love our children a lot and never scold or beat them. If they do mistake, we can tell them in a positive way.
This is a great technique to handle situation which we need to learn. And It can be possible by practicing Rajyoga Meditation. It gives great positive vibration to face any kind of situation in a positive way.
I am sharing some child-parents relationship videos of BK Shivani Sister: